Letter to Tia thank you, Mandy 🇺🇸

Hello Tiara,

I thought I’d touch base. I received a call yesterday from Naomi Von Batavia regarding group home referrals. I just really wanted to let you know that although I felt fine, inviting my cousin into my home disrupted my life beyond what I had anticipated and I ultimately had a relapse, was yelling angrily and apparently my dad called the cops. You probably realize this but I have had a history of hospitalizations always related to drug use so your county didn’t hesitate to commit me. I hadn’t drank in seven years. So honestly I feel like this outcome has been harsh in a sense multiple hospitalizations, cops, a shelter, and now a long term treatment facility. But the fact is I needed to quit smoking weed for good, for real, and quit vaping. I have and I could vape here and don’t. This restricted environment has actually turned out to be teriffic because I now walk two times a day eat less regularly and am back full force to reading and productive stuff I once studied and taught namely, psychology and neuroscience and consciousness and so forth, and it has all combined to instill even more meaning in life for me. I’d like to say more, but I won’t out of respect for your time. I also really appreciated the Hospital stay in Alexandria although I don’t feel I needed to be there to be honest and I believe the psychiatrist more or less agreed with me. I met a guy my age who is very smart and nice and fun to be friends with now and we keep in touch. And for what it’s worth the hospital was excellent. The staff was fantastic. The food was great. The whole thing was a positive and I have a very good memory of it.

I would like to end then with probably the most important part of this message and that is prior to my cousin coming to live with me. I had an extended amount of time, years, doing very well living on my own. I had even started my own independent taxi business Blarides.com and I actually built the website on my own lol. I might return to that. I was volunteering at the food shelf regularly and helping unload the food truck and helping out with bridges of hope. I even volunteered at the common goods thrift store. I’m not a great cook, but I was cooking ok every night and eating well and I was on snap and then I got off snap because I told them I was working. But when I get back, I have to decide whether or not to keep trying to drive taxi and if I don’t, I’ll remain, on Social Security and the benefits will then go back to the normal amount and I will continue to go to the food shelf and probably volunteer at the food shelf. I definitely have been happiest and the best off living near my parents. I hope and trust they feel comfortable and happy with me there and I believe they do. They stop by all the time and we have great conversations. I go down there occasionally to watch a series with them. My point is I have been through a lot and I am a mature educated 50 year-old man who admits my thinking got a little off after having Hugo stay with me in retrospect, but I don’t think I was ever out of my right mind beside the time the night I drank too much and like I said that was a relapse. Hugo lied and I got a Domestic I’m going to court for next month. His own sister has not spoken to him in seven years and I just received a really nice long text from her. She’s a special ed teacher in New Hampshire and apologized for Hugo and even said he does things like this. Not to start talking about my cousin because I still love him and actually feel sorry for him. He needs help. I hadn’t drank in seven years. I guess there’s no need to reiterate anything even though I feel tempted to, but I just encourage you to consider this message when deciding whether or not to end the commitment at a group home. My dad has made it clear to me that if that be the case that I have to spend two months at a group home that I’m still obviously and he seemed enthusiastic and encouraging invited and expected to come home to live in their other house in Nisswa. I love my neighbors. I love walking every day with my mom. I’m single and so I appreciate the time I get to spend with my folks. OK, that is definitely probably already too much but I needed to share that with you. Prime West here in Bemidji encouraged me strongly to definitely advocate for myself. Thanks I look forward to communicating with you by email or by phone and I told Naomi that I’m not interested in signing referrals because I expect to go home and I thought that was what we agreed upon in my first assessment or or meeting with the staff in charge here at Prime West. Don’t get me wrong. I understand I’m not in control. But like I said, Prime West said I should advocate for myself. I want to ensure you I have actually developed very good mental health throughout the 50 years even though they’ve been challenging and still deal with anxiety, something I have had to throughout my life.

Oh, and I should include that I am continuing to see my therapist who I had been seeing throughout the prior year. I have a meds manager in Baxter who is fantastic. I’ve seen the doctor here and I have a doctor in Baxter still. I really love living in Crow Wing County and just so you know if you do decide to make me carry out the last two months of the commitment at a group home I will not live in Duluth. I just have too much sad history there and never really want to go back to Duluth. And Duluth is a beautiful city. I realize that with beautiful people.

Thanks Tiara,

Peter Breitholtz

Sent from my iPhone